Today morning was the NPCC Pass-out Parade. Vanessa and I were invited. As usual, I shy the whole way out at there. Sigh... I really wish I could turn back time and tell my story again. I just simply don't like what I'm living now, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Is this what they call pressure? If that is so, I think this is the first time I had this kind of feelings, the feeling of many boulders stacking down on my back and walking on uneven road - alone. There dosen't seem to be any light infront of my path and I could anytime stumble on something, or walk the wrong path. Or am I already trapped at this labyrinth? Is this what people call retribution? So many people hurted by me, and worst of all my promise to God. I betrayed God. I'm so shamed.